so im doing it im taking that next step

so i have asked Courtney out in a manner of speaking and i know where I'm going to take her out to eat i plan to take her to t:::::::::::::e... sorry i cant tell yall on here its a surprise for her at least and dot sense sense i know my sister will tell her, so i cant put anything important on here because she might read it on ...a side note you know i still kind of don't feel ready for this but i guess i don't feel ready for most anything i do so that's nothing new well I'm going to bed night all

these times be a changing

to all my SEEK friends i will miss you so i thought i would say by goodbyes on here and remember you always so if i miss anyone im sorry but i guess only one person reads my blog so it doesn't really matter .... BUT i will do it anyway starting now -Julie-you were a really caring friend-Luke-you are one of the funniest people i know-josh-your so random and at times i think you just a tiny bit rude but i will miss you none the less-Daniel-your a cool man Daniel and im glad i cool know you over this past year-mac-at times you make things awkward but sense i love when its awkward i wouldn't change a thing about you-Elizabeth-i will never forget when we all climbed that mountain and i almost didn't make it at the end and you stayed and help me climb that last part thank you i will miss you loudness-Alex-dude Alex we have alot in common and im glad that i got to meet you your a chill guy and a great friend-Stephanie-well now Stephanie im very glad i met you i clearly remember you getting to seek late and i was having a tough time with life and was outside thinking you you stayed and talked with me through my problems i have never told someone that much about me that i didn't know that well and i just want to say thank you for your friendship and your ear-Whitney- your small and your loud and your a good friend i know we having talked much but i will miss seeing you just as much as the rest of my friends-Carisa-you were a good friend and i enjoyed hanging out with you ------ well as you see i just put the seniors down that i wont see any more and will miss thank you all for the wonderful year you all have helped change my life. sorry 11th - 6th graders if i put everyone i would miss i don't think i would be done with this till i was like 20 or something bye my WEAG family i will miss you all

i hope i can fly

well to being with the back story. i long time ago a year maybe two im not sure. i sent a friend request to this random girl on facebook see once a month i sent out random friend request to people just to make new friends. now back on point her mane was becky and we started talking we had alot in common and after a while traded phone numbers and started texting we would text almost every day all day that lasted a long time. seven months ago she text me asking if i could call her and i did her father had gotten cancer and was going to die well on that day i sent the first thing i could think of to cheer her up a flower pic over the phone and then i did that one flower a day every day (no two flowers the same) i ran out of flowers at 100 days 100 flowers and i never missed a day. well july 23 her father passed away i went straight to her house and held her in my arms as she cried well i had to leave at about midnight so i could sleep before work sadly. the next day she text me the funeral was monday. i went to it and again held heer in my arms during the service while she cried. it broke my heart to see her so hurt with nothing i could do to stop it. (btw side note most any guy hates it when a girl starts to cry and will do most anything to make her stop) so after that it made me start thinking and i started to relise that i love her and yet i dont want to date her there is another girl that i want to date and yet i love this other one. one of my friends called me crazy that what i was doing made no sense and it doesnt. there is no logic behind this choice im jumping off a cliff and hopeing i can fly