i hope i can fly

well to being with the back story. i long time ago a year maybe two im not sure. i sent a friend request to this random girl on facebook see once a month i sent out random friend request to people just to make new friends. now back on point her mane was becky and we started talking we had alot in common and after a while traded phone numbers and started texting we would text almost every day all day that lasted a long time. seven months ago she text me asking if i could call her and i did her father had gotten cancer and was going to die well on that day i sent the first thing i could think of to cheer her up a flower pic over the phone and then i did that one flower a day every day (no two flowers the same) i ran out of flowers at 100 days 100 flowers and i never missed a day. well july 23 her father passed away i went straight to her house and held her in my arms as she cried well i had to leave at about midnight so i could sleep before work sadly. the next day she text me the funeral was monday. i went to it and again held heer in my arms during the service while she cried. it broke my heart to see her so hurt with nothing i could do to stop it. (btw side note most any guy hates it when a girl starts to cry and will do most anything to make her stop) so after that it made me start thinking and i started to relise that i love her and yet i dont want to date her there is another girl that i want to date and yet i love this other one. one of my friends called me crazy that what i was doing made no sense and it doesnt. there is no logic behind this choice im jumping off a cliff and hopeing i can fly